Asher's Harry Potter Birthday Party

July 30, 2012- My oldest son turned four. What a big kid! He got to choose his theme this year, and he chose (as my heart swelled with love) HARRY POTTER. What a kid. <3

And so, we did it. We went to Party City for a lot of the supplies this year. One of the things the hubby and I did that was really a party-maker (and a LOT of fun) was make wands. We got the tutorial here and it worked wonderfully!

 We also got some black party hats, they were pretty cute on the kids :)

Since he is a little older now, we thought it would be appropriate to do goody bags this time, too. We got plain white lunch bags and I drew a little Harry Potter design on them. Inside, we put (from Party City and a dollar store) some "horcrux" goodies: necklaces, rings, little snakes, mini journals (with little pens), cups (they were actually little trophies for a soccer themed party, which we just took off of the mounted part- looked awesome), tiaras, circular glasses (to represent Harry as the last horcrux) and a little candy, too. The kids (and adults) loved them!

 I also got just a plain ball-shaped pinata from Party City and made it up to look like a dementor. Wish I had gotten a photo of it, but hey, at least the idea is out there for anyone else looking to plan a HP party. One of my coworkers happens to be a cupcake guru, and he offered to make Butterbeer cupcakes for the party! They turned out great, and I found the recipe at this site. Otherwise for food, just the basics- grill food, lemonade, etc. But my little man had an amazing time!

 Expecto patronum!

 Ham.

 

 Victory!!

 Ira wanted to do spells, too.

 Those glasses make him look so much older! Happy Birthday to my wonderful son, Asher Cailen. You are truly an amazing person, and I am so blessed to be your mother. May you never grow too old for the magic of childhood.

 "Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." -JK Rowling (Albus Dumbledore)

Ira Jude Turns Two

My youngest son turned two on May 30, 2012. We didn't have a big party for him, as we lost my beloved stepmother just the day before. There will be a post about her, as well, but I simply don't have the strength (or the time) to write everything that needs to be written for her at the moment. I will do it soon, though- I can feel my heart longing to pour itself out (finally).

But back to the celebrations. We were at my father's house, and let the boys go swimming and play while we went through pictures of Diane and we all tried to stay as positive as we could. I decided to make my little man some cupcakes, and I thought to myself, What do I give him as a 'treat' when he is being exceptionally good? And so, of course, I bought some cake mix, crushed some Oreos into the batter, frosted them with cream cheese frosting, and topped them with gummy worms. Sort of like "dirt cakes", but cake instead of pudding.

The taste test...

Kid looks happy to me!

Happy Birthday, Ira. I know grandma was there with you, too. <3

Adventure Is Out There!

Asher's "Up" themed birthday party was awesome. My mother offered her beautiful home for us, which is lakefront with a very kid-friendly beach. The weather cooperated (thankfully!), the kids had a blast, and everything looked (and tasted) amazing.

For starters, I got ahold of the "Up" soundtrack (which is fantastic!), and we used that as party music throughout the day. We bought a cardboard playhouse from this website, which I painted with some regular tempera paints. We also went ahead and got some helium balloon kits, which worked wonderfully! We ended up having more helium than we needed for the balloons, so I recommend buying extra just in case. The end result:

For food, we made fresh lemonade with lemon slices, some little pretzel bites (Pillsbury bread sticks with kosher salt and Italian cheese, with marinara for dipping), and rainbow cupcakes with icing "clouds" on top, and little "Up" houses in the clouds. The cupcake recipe is courtesy of these lovely people, except I just used a standard French Vanilla cake mix (butter instead of vegetable oil), cream cheese icing, and for the houses: airheads with Dum-Dums (dipped in sugar glaze and then rolled in those little circular sprinkles). You can stick the little houses to the lollipop stick so they hold together easily on top of the cupcake.

Note: don't make these if you're worried about sugar intake. I mean, it's almost entirely made of sugar. But you know, it was a treat. That was the point. And the kids friggin loved them! A lot of them just wanted the candy on top and left the rainbow cupcakes behind! But that was ok, I ate about four of those abandoned little gems.

All in all, the kids had an amazing time and everything worked out. My little man was one happy birthday boy.

Love!!!

Childbirth II: Ira Jude LeBeau, May 30 2010

My second labor experience-

The pregnancy was really great. I had a lot more fatigue than the first time around, but he grew really well and kicked all the time. I gained a bit more weight, around 35 lbs.

May 29, 2010
I was 21 years old. I had my 37 week OB appointment the day before, and he said my cervix was very soft and I was dilated to a 3 already. He said not to get my hopes up, but he wouldn't be surprised if I delivered that weekend. I ate dinner with my family, checked my blood pressure (which was good), and went to a favorite coffee shop with my husband and son before heading home for the night. It was there, at about 9:00 that I felt the beginnings of my water breaking. Since this was nothing like my previous experience (one huge gush during a wretched contraction), I wasn't entirely sure, but we headed home anyway. It continued on and off for about 20 minutes, clear liquid, and I decided to call the hospital. The nurse told me to come on in, and so we called Trevor's parents to pick up Asher and brought the bag with us (just in case).
They got to us right away since it was so late, and we hung out in the room while they checked heart rates and ran a test on the liquid to make sure it was amniotic fluid. Since the test took awhile, we ended up being there for about 2 hours, but we were perfectly happy to be there, giggling and enjoying each other's company. Around 11:30, they let us know that it was, in fact, my water breaking, and we were led to our room and encouraged to walk around for awhile. They gave Trev some coffee and I had ice water, and we lazily made laps around the quiet hallways, pushing each other like a couple of flirty teenagers. What can I say? We were giddy about this one; it was beautiful to see my body doing this on its own, and it started things off very peacefully.
My contractions were mild and felt satisfying in some way. I easily kept a smile on my face or carried on a conversation without wincing. After a bit, I decided to get into the tub to relax a bit, which was enjoyable (I would've liked to have stayed there for the whole thing). We decided to attempt sleep around 1am because things didn't seem to be progressing, so we put on a movie and closed our eyes.
Of course, 20 minutes later, the real contractions started in. It was gradual and it felt like each contraction was doing something big. I felt good, despite the pain. They kept the lights dim which really helped the mood, and there was one sweet nurse who sat at the end of the bed and rubbed my feet. I couldn't believe how much this helped with the pain! Once again, everything progressed very quickly, and by 3:00 I was fully dilated. I am lucky to be blessed with quick labors and healthy pregnancies, and I hope this trend continues :)
I stayed in the same position as last time, but I felt much more comfortable and aware of my surroundings. I pushed for a little less time, maybe half an hour, and he was there in my arms. 7lbs 10oz and lovely, I held him for awhile before I let them clean him off. My mother was allowed to come in after he was born, even though it was 3:57am, and so my mother and Trevor took pictures of him again, while I finished my labor.

A more experienced daddy :)

The afterbirth was easy enough, I do remember it this time and got to see the umbilical cord (which all the nurses exclaimed was really thick, not sure what that means) and the placenta. It was really cool to get to see that; I was in such a daze with the first that I never got to. No episiotomy this time, and I healed up just fine. AND, I could walk :) Breastfeeding went well, also. I was a MUCH happier camper this time around.

Other good news: they let us leave a day early! It was great to be at home.

Brothers!

To wrap things up, I had a much better experience the second time, with no drugs and minimal invasive procedures. I would love to try a home birth next time around, with a Midwife and my family near me. Unfortunately, midwives are illegal here in South Dakota, but my family and I are moving back to my hometown (Mesa, AZ) this winter and we hope to have our next child there.

Childbirth: Asher Cailen LeBeau, July 30 2008

Okay. We aren't trying for another baby or anything (yet) but I have been thinking a lot about my past birth experiences, and what I would do differently if I could go back. I'm going to go through both of my birth stories and then talk about what I would like for my next child.

July 30, 2008
I was 19 years old. Back in November, Trevor and I had decided we wanted a baby (no, we weren't married, yes, we were young, no, we didn't care, no, we don't regret it), and were lucky enough to conceive within the first month of trying. The pregnancy was healthy, normal, and, frankly, wonderful.
I am naturally very thin, weighing about 98 lbs before the pregnancy. I have never been on any special diets or anything; this is just the way my body is, and always has been. At full term, I had gained exactly 25 lbs, and this being the most significant weight change of my entire life, I was extremely uncomfortable. I was pretty uneducated about different birthing options at the time, and I had no idea that anything other than a hospital birth was available. The doctors and nurses love to throw all kinds of "options" at you, induction being an increasingly popular option.
And so, being a first-time mother and very young, not to mention out of my element, I thought induction sounded wonderful. There were no negative affects of pitocin, or so I was told. It would be a simple IV medication to jump start my labor, and that was it, plain and simple. Of course, I agreed, and on this Wednesday morning at 5:30, we strolled sleepily into the hospital with our bags and went to the birth center.

The thing is, if my doctor hadn't agreed to it, I would've gone into labor within days of this induction. My body was so ready; I already had my bloody show and had been having contractions for days. I just didn't want to wait for my body, and I'm ashamed to admit that.
Around 7:30, they finally got the IV in (they were training nurses, which was just great for me; also, it took about 6 tries to get the needle in- talk about invasive), and the contractions started within minutes. It was so intense, and so fast. I was completely overwhelmed by the pain and there was hardly any time to rest between them. I had my mother and Trevor in the room with me (along with about three nurses) and they were doing their best to help me with the pain. What I did not know at the time was that pitocin is known to make contractions worse than normal labor contractions. As in, let's make these STRONGER and CLOSER TOGETHER, cause that's what this woman wants. No wonder there is such a high epidural rate for women who are induced!!!

Within a half hour, my water had broken on its own. I was already dilated to a 3. One thing no one ever told me about hospital birth was how much it truly HURTS for them to check your dilation via vaginal exam. They wouldn't even wait for a space between contractions- it was excruciating. I was very annoyed by one nurse in particular, who kept saying, "Keep your eyes open. Find a focal point and concentrate on it." Well, I wanted to close my eyes. It felt natural. That was my point of focus. Closing my eyes blocked out distractions and was helping me to get into a zone of some sort. But this damned nurse just kept at it.
After about two hours, I was being offered a lot of medication but I had made it very clear that I did NOT want an epidural. Eventually I broke down and took nubain (which, as one mom put it, works about as well as a bottle of cheap tequila), and it really just made me sleepy. I dozed off between contractions (which doesn't seem ideal- I wanted to be conscious for this). The labor progressed very quickly, and by 10:30 I was fully dilated and ready to push.
I knew it was time, I could feel it, and I told them right away, "I need to push now." I was in the typical position for hospital births: flat on my back, legs spread. I just thought this was how it was always done. I pushed for 45 minutes and then he was there, 6lbs 14oz. They placed him on my chest and I felt him, warm and slippery and alive. I couldn't focus very well; the drugs made it extremely hard to hold my eyes open. I tried with all my strength to concentrate and see him and remember everything. The doctor cut the umbilical cord and they took him to clear out his airways (he inhaled something on the way out).

I remember hearing what sounded like a fountain of fluid gushing out of me. Trevor and my mom were with the baby, taking pictures, making sure he was okay (he was fine), and I suppose I pushed out the afterbirth, although this is very hazy for me and I don't remember much. The doc stitched me up since I had been given an episiotomy (which I don't remember), and that was mostly that. I couldn't stand up or walk unassisted for the first day, as I had fractured my tailbone during the pushing process. It was a result of the position I was in, in combination with the lack of fatty tissue covering my tailbone. In other words, I have no ass, and so sitting directly on my tailbone for 45 minutes while pushing out a baby proved to be too much. Obviously, had I been given other laboring options, this would have been avoided.

A terrified new father :)

I was encouraged to breastfeed (which was nice), and he latched on right away. We stayed for our required 3 days, and home we went. All in all, it wasn't what I wanted, but we got a healthy baby boy out of it, and that's the most important thing.

Victory!

I Love Birthdays!

Birthdays are always fun for me. I'm one of those moms who throws dorky birthday parties and makes a bit of a fuss about it... even if they're too young to remember. What can I say?

On July 30th, my little Asher will be three years old! Ira had his first birthday May 30th and we just couldn't believe it. Methinks this post will just be a bit of reminiscing and pictures... to be followed up by some awesome pics and details of Asher's "Up" themed birthday party.

 Asher's first day

 Asher's first birthday

 Asher's second birthday (lots of running around... can't believe I didn't get a good shot of him)

 Ira's first day

Ira's first birthday

We were fortunate enough to be able to have both the boys' first birthday parties at the same location. It was fun to go back and "do it all over again" with the second little man. Of course, we actually gave in and let Ira have a cupcake... with Asher we were still on a no sugar, no exceptions policy and he got natural wild berry pie. I guess there was some whipped cream thrown in there, which uncle Jeremy ate most of:

Ha! Good times.

Speaking of cupcakes, here are the totally bad-ass baked goods that my dear friend Angie Kones made for Ira's party:

Be warned! Super sugary. But delicious. Recipe can be found here:

http://www.geekstir.com/om-nom-nom-nom-cookie-monster-cupcakes

That's all for now. Hmph.

Love!

The Submission of Wives to Their Husbands: Why It's COMPLETELY Unnecessary

I know this is a strange topic to start things out with, but it's been on my mind: why do Christian women feel it is necessary to submit to their husbands? I've been with my husband for 5 years (married for almost 2) and this has never even been an issue in our relationship. There's never been a conversation about who is in charge and who needs to be "taken care of" or "led in the right direction". There has always been an air of equality between us that has made our life together very simple and enjoyable.

And so, it perplexes me, why the church continues to push this on every marriage. They make sure you completely understand the "rules" of being married, what your assigned "place" is in said marriage, and what is expected of you. The thing I don't understand is that God made us all very different, with our own strengths and weaknesses, our own likes and dislikes, and, yes, spiritual perspectives. Not one person believes 100% what another does, regardless of what you might think. Eventually, you come across something you disagree upon. And then what does the church tell you to do? Well, if you have a penis, you are correct. If you have a vagina, you're wrong, and must submit to your partner's views. (If you are transgender or gay, you don't even count, but that's another post ENTIRELY. Not getting started on that one today.)

Wouldn't it work out much better if there weren't so many heinous rules and policies? Shouldn't these decisions be left for each couple to make in their own circumstances, without there being that final conversation-ending line from the husband's mouth, "...well, I am the spiritual leader here, and as my wife (whom I love) I expect you to honor that."

Now, a lot of argument on the church's side is that the husband is not complying to his side of the bargain in this instance, which is that he is to love his wife as Christ loved the church. But riddle me this, Batman: since when have people EVER been known to be perfect and humble? It's ridiculous to give one person final say, EVERY TIME, based on what's in their pants. Men and women alike eventually abuse any power they are given, no matter how level-headed they are, and regardless of how good their heart is. People are flawed.

They say that one of the reasons a woman should submit to her husband is that it is a test of faith and humility to God. The woman should demonstrate her willingness to humble herself and trust God by doing so for her husband. But why should a woman do so for her husband, and not the other way around? This implies that a man is the gateway to a woman's relationship with God, comparable to the way a Catholic priest is viewed as a "middle man" between God and the people of the church. This puts one person above another, giving a certain "privilege" to that person. Are Christian women really expected to believe that they need a man to prove their faith in God? Why should another person be placed in charge of their own spiritual journey?

Growing up a conservative Christian, I recall being told as a child to ignore people who question certain teachings in the Bible, that they are just evil-doers who are trying to stir things up and send you to hell. This is the defense mechanism that is instilled in all of us when we grow up in the church. Well, I can safely say that I still believe in God and all the teachings of love and acceptance that the Bible has to offer. I am not trying to lead you away from your own faith or send you to hell. But when something doesn't sit right with me, when I feel that pang within myself, I have learned to ask these questions. If it feels wrong, it probably is. This is a golden rule to live by. We must learn not to use our religion or spirituality as a weapon to belittle, degrade, alienate, or discriminate against other people.

A happy, healthy, and loving marriage CAN exist without following the stringent rules of these Bible verses. Some may say that if this is how I live my life, I am not a true Christian. If I don't follow every stinking verse, I am being unfaithful to God. But let me stop you there, because none of us are true Christians if that's the case. No one fits perfectly into the little box assigned to us. I don't have all the answers; hell, I may not have ANY of them. But this is what feels right. 


Love.